some stillness in my head

guided tours of my hands through my hair.
i could trust myself for one more day.
one more day, i could sit on your couch and stare at you as if i wasn't aware that my eyes affect you...
that is, if they do.
what matters most to me right now is the affect you have on me,
and what it means.
i've got a distance,
and i've got a wall
and i've got a voice to call.
fall fall Jerico.
rise rise Jerusalem.
fall fall vanity.
rise rise sanity.
reasoning...was that really a strong point for me?

i miss us.
and i miss what that once meant
and long for what's been lost.
if it's not,
my heart tells me it very soon will be.

an end of sorts is near.

for who?


on this topic, there is still some stillness in my head.